How to be Funny 101

I needed a picture for this post so
here's a picture of me eating a Rubik's cube

Does your writing seem dry and humourless? Are you lacking in laughter? Have your characters forgotten how to crack a joke? Or were you just born without a Sense of Humour? Well you've come to the right place. Today I'm going to tell you how to get a Sense of Humour because you yourself need one in order to write something that makes people laugh. In order to get a Sense of Humour you have to go to your local Walmart and in the fresh produce section you'll find a Sense of Humour. Buy that and eat it. After consuming it you'll be funny. Trust me. It works.


Well this is kinda short for a blog post. I suppose I could just keep rambling and give more tips in case you don't have the money to buy a Sense of Humour.

Eating a platypus is also a wonderful way to get a Sense of Humour. Platypus meat will activate the dormant humour genes in your DNA. Because of the strange appearance of the platypus they are naturally hilarious. This hilarity will apply itself to your DNA after consuming it.
Warning: this method might possibly result in growing a beaver like tail or a duck bill.

Kissing a tree will also activate those dormant humour genes. It has to be a maple tree from Canada though. Kissing a Canadian maple tree will give you a Sense of Humour right away. Or a Georgian maple tree. That works sometimes too. But Canadian maple trees work the best.

Sacrifice a chicken to the imaginary humour gods. This is bound not to work. It actually destroys any Sense of Humour you already have. So I guess this isn't the best thing to do. Don't do this. It's cruel to chickens and anyone who ever talks to you. Trust me they don't want you more dry than you already are. But if you do sacrifice a chicken it will help you summon anyone you want to your location so you can bore them to death. Chicken sacrifice is needed in summoning spells.

Memorize a joke book and use the jokes every single chance you get. This will give you a fake Sense of Humour that'll probably be more annoying than anything else but you might get a few laughs. It's better than nothing if you can't find a Canadian maple tree or a platypus. Also always say the jokes in a really bad British accent. It makes the jokes wayyyyy funnier. Trust me.

Hopefully you will gain a Sense of Humour using one of these many tips. If not I'm sorry. I guess you're too boring to ever be funny. But that's all I have for today, weirdos. Have a lovely day and don't sue me if you get a duck bill from eating a platypus.